Chalk this one up as another weird invention straight from Asia. If you want to talk about this without laughing or mocking — it is a hand-crank paper shredder and pencil sharpener that happens to look like a panda. The slot on the topside is obviously not big enough for anything more than a Post-It note, but hey, now those identity thieves won't know that you need lactose milk from the store. Between the eyes of the panda is the not-very-awkwardly placed hole for the pencil to go in.

Once the panda is full of your unwanted miniature documents and pencil shavings, you crack him open and dump all of the insides in the trash, you know, like real pandas. The panda shredder/sharpener sells for $12. No refunds on dignity or self-respect.

Mini Animal Paper Shredders, via Technabob